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Date Ideas

Do You Need a Backup Date Idea?

ooooo-kay… so I scrapped my first draft of our chicken parma date idea. It was written, complete and ready to go live, but in essence my review sucked because the date sucked! Which opened up the question:

Should you have a backup plan if the initial date turns out to be a flop?

So what went wrong? voted the Lionel Hotel as the top place to eat a chicken parma in Melbourne’s CBD, so that’s where we went for date night. Now I don’t mind a good parma, Emma on the other hand does not! Can you can see where this date is headed already? Emma didn’t have fun and this rubbed off on me. Date night is no fun when your date is not enjoying themselves.

Now I’m not angry, and not saying that Emma’s mood ruined my night. In hindsight, this was a night out for the boys, not a night with your date, unless of course your date barracks for Collingwood or Oakland Raiders.

And so, at the end of the night Emma put forth a notion… “we should have a backup plan just in case the original date sucked!”

I disagree!

I believe that you need to have low points to appreciate the highs. Emma believes that every date should be amazing. But let’s be realistic, it’s impossible to make EVERY date idea amazing. There are too many variables for things to go wrong, and what if your second idea sucks too! What if the 3rd or 4th date idea sucks as well! Who needs that kind of pressure for date night?

I think we need to learn from the experience. If it flopped, so what – it’s still better than doing the same thing you did last night… watch tv until it’s bed time. You can always do better next week.

What’s your thoughts? Do you want to see fireworks for every date night? And if yes, can you handle the responsibility of making sure your date has the most amazing time ever!

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18 comments for “Do You Need a Backup Date Idea?”

  1. Posted by Ada | August 17, 2012, 9:18 am

    If my partner took me out for chicken parma he would definitely need a back-up plan! Considering it isn’t a food I could eat, and would result in me being sick for the rest of the week!
    But otherwise, a back-up plan? no, not necessarily.
    Forward planning first I think is key, and if the date goes astray find something else to do after to lighten the mood. For example, go somewhere else for a gelato and walk somewhere nice, so she can playfully banter about your poor date venue choice! haha

  2. Posted by Sheridan | August 17, 2012, 9:32 am

    I think that some people have unrealistic expectations of a date – honestly, as long as the company and the conversation is good, who cares where you are? If the most important part of the date is what you eat for dinner, then the date is already in trouble. Every girl likes to be taken to a nice restaurant sometimes, but if your date takes you to their favourite pub, that’s ok too. Let’s not get too precious about these things, dates are supposed to be fun.

  3. Posted by Jamis | August 17, 2012, 10:00 am

    I feel the main objective to date night is taking time out with your loved one to enjoy each others company and focus on each other without distractions. Everything else his a hit or miss and should be low pressure. We have to much pressure from every day commitments, so why put pressure on a date night, plus the beginning of a not so fun date night could lead to some spontaneous event which are usually the best.

  4. Posted by Andy | August 17, 2012, 10:33 am

    I agree with Sheridan in that some people have unrealistic expectations of a date, especially if a couple has been together for quite a while. Not every date can be the ‘greatest nigth ever’ & from time to time we’re gonna hit a dud. But I disagree with the back-up plan, preferring to make up for it on the following date. A few bad dates in a row? Then maybe a change of plan is called for rather than a back-up plan.

  5. Posted by angela | August 17, 2012, 10:47 am

    Hello Folks!
    I’m AGAINST the backup date. Dating is the time you’re getting to know each other,what works and don’t work. The emphasis should be on WHOM you’re going out. Now grant it we all want to have a good time but like someone said what if the back up flops? I also think every once in a while a date SHOULD flop just to see how strong your relationship is. (Just my thoughts)take care everyone!

    Stay Bougie,

  6. Posted by Kerryn | August 17, 2012, 10:56 am

    I think that it is the thought that counts. If you go out and the meal is bad or the place is not “fun”, the night will be what you make of it. The point is that someone has gone to the trouble of arranging it and you can still have some wonderful conversations and make your own fun, even if it is discussing the bad meal or terrible service. So no, I don’t think you need a back up plan. If all else fails then go home and make your own fun there !! :)

  7. Posted by MGirl | August 17, 2012, 12:40 pm

    No back up plan needed… dud date nights are all part of the fun! Gives you something to laugh about the next day :)

  8. Posted by Katarina | August 17, 2012, 2:19 pm

    Clearly you’ve worked hard so far and Em has high expectations now, so a dinner out at a not so special place is definitely not going to cut it. Come on you are doing this for living, coming up with ideas to spice up the conversation, date, sex etc. I would’ve thought that you would be a natural by now and have the ideas coming out of your sleeve ready to impress the lady. Maybe you could have discussed your favorite pets and why… I don’t know something, anything, just not those faces on a date. Where did the creativity evaporate?

  9. Posted by Denis | August 18, 2012, 1:51 pm

    Thanks ya’ll for the support! Team Den wins… down with back up plans – you get one shot at the date on the night and if it fails wear it on the chin.

    Katarina, you know what you’re totally right, (even if you are biased being Emma’s old boss) our facial expressions ARE terrible… these photos have me motivated to make the next date idea AWESOME!

    Thanks for commenting, happy dating!



  10. Posted by Emma | August 18, 2012, 2:10 pm

    Leeet’s get a few things straight here.

    1) Despite what my darling husband will have you believe, I do not expect every date to be AMAZING. (Though we also know there’s a difference in standards between his “amazing” and my “amazing”!) We’ve been doing this long enough to know that’s just not possible. Just the other week I took Den to Blacklight Mini Golf and that one sucked too! But I do think you should know your partner well enough to read what they do and don’t like. Remember, date night is about putting in a bit of effort to have a fun night with each other – and it’s about thinking about the other person. You’re taking them out to show them a good time, and maybe even give them a new experience. I can’t say deep fried foods are my favourite thing to eat, neither are noisy pubs my favourite place to hang out.

    2) *Those* faces were just a small sample of the night. That was me being overwhelmed by the dino-chicken on my plate that I couldn’t eat! I think that was Den being upset that he didn’t win the meat raffle after we’d bought tickets for it. It was definitely a good representation of the overall feeling we were left with after this date, but we actually chatted and joked as normal for most of the night.

    3) If your night really is over that quickly (it was so noisy we couldn’t talk, we needed to get out of there. There was no reason to stay once we’d finished eating. Certainly not for the ambience) and neither of you are having a great time despite your best efforts, I still stand by my suggestion to turn it around at least by going for a walk, getting a drink at a cool bar nearby, having hot chocolates in a little cafe, getting ice cream cones, etc. Den declined to do all those things in favour of heading back to the couch and watching a movie. Which is NOT the point of date night. We’re on the couch every night, after all. Given that we’re in a long-term relationship, if I have gone to the effort to get OFF the couch, get dressed up and head out for date night, I don’t want it to be over that quickly and not have had a good time.

    I’m not saying I have huge expectations. I know sometimes these dates we’re reviewing don’t pan out the way we want them to. I’m just saying, why wouldn’t you put in a little extra effort and make it a saveable night?

  11. Posted by Denis | August 18, 2012, 2:20 pm

    “Excuse me for being so rude, it wasn’t me… it was my food!”

    The parma was HUGE… that was no ordinary chicken. I promised myself, like a good Croatian, that I would finish my meal.

    Who knew that it would force me into a food coma?!!? The couch was the ONLY remedy. Nothing else could fit in my stomach… I felt like I was being prep’d for human foie gras!

  12. Posted by MGirl | September 28, 2012, 10:42 am

    Now that I’ve read Emma’s response I have switched teams to team Emma :)
    Sorry Den

  13. Posted by Denis | October 1, 2012, 11:34 am

    Not cool MGirl, not cool at all.

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