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Happy New Year!
If you believe the Mayan conspiracy theorists or even that nut job that is holding out that his third (or is it fourth?) apocalypse prediction will eventually come true, this may be our last year on Earth.
Here’s a question for you though: If your days really were numbered, what would you do differently in your relationship?
Most of us are accustomed to making our own personal New Year resolutions. Lose weight. Do more yoga. Drink less. Save money.
But one thing people aren’t very good at is recognising what they need to do in their relationships to make them better, and actively trying to improve.
A more common strategy in recent years has been: Relationship not working? Quick, get the hell out of there! Find the right person, this clearly isn’t them.
Marriages lately are over faster than you can say Kardashian.
Forget the apocalypse, if we keep modelling our relationships on celebrity marriages and chasing sky-high Hollywood rom-com expectations and if we can’t learn to recognise that relationships are never instantly going to be great – that they are a life’s work, a continual evolvement of yourself and your union – then we really are all doomed.
What can you resolve to do better in your relationships this year?
If we really only had this year left, I wager many people would resolve to stop taking their partner for granted.
It’s an easy trap of a long term relationship – we humans love our routines so much that it’s easy to trip and fall right into one without even realising. We just assume our partner will always be there for us and we stop trying so hard. Big mistake.
Perhaps you know you and your partner aren’t always so nice to each other. It’s easy to get grouchy when day-to-day stresses get in the way and patterns of snippy comments aimed at your partner are hard to break. Life (and relationships) are too short for being grumpy. Be nicer to each other.
The potential is endless: Have More Adventures, Spend More Time Together, Stop Walking Out During Arguments, Don’t Be So Clingy…
What is it that your relationship will benefit from in 2012? Work it out and consciously aim to be better at it. That is how relationships grow. That is how they evolve and become lifelong partnerships.
No one ever said it would be easy, or automatic. A perfect relationship? There’s no app for that. No quick solution. But all it does require is commitment and a willingness to work through it.
The benefit of making resolutions as a couple is that you’re accountable to someone. Set the ground rules and help each other stick to them.
If we only have one year left, let’s make it a loved-up one.
Writer, dating columnist, wife, coffee addict, foodie, fashionista... Melburnian through and through. Muser, dancer, blogger, tweeter. Likes to get her head on telly now and again. Sleeper, dreamer, a sucker for romance. And of course... a cheap date.
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