// you’re reading...

Married Life

Pleased to Meet You!

After our marriage in March, I started to go about the process of changing my name. It was a decision I made (with some very strong encouragement from Denis) and am still very happy with. I like the idea of being on Team Merkas, of me and my children all having the same unified family name. Of course, I don’t think women must take on their husband’s surname – whatever works for you, works for you.

Changing your name after marriage

The problem is, I got about halfway through carrying out necessary paperwork and then just kind of… ran out of steam. So, I am Emma Merkas on my email accounts, my Facebook, my Twitter and when I sign letters. I even think my phone company has caught up and switched me over. Unfortunately on all the legal stuff I’m still Veale…. I haven’t quite gotten there just yet! I still am planning on it, but MAN. There’s so much to change!

So I’m quasi-there. Merkle, if you will (ha). I guess I should just get over it and go do it. In fact, Denis is threatening to take away my wedding band until I change it. I think positive reinforcement is more my thing… perhaps promises of a celebratory dinner at a posh restaurant for when I do change it… hmmm?

Did you change your last name? Did you keep it? Are you happy with your decision?

What’s Den have to say about this…

Positive reinforcement – honey you are delusional!!!

Emma, why don’t you tell the good people on this blog how you scammed me for an EXTRA wedding ring! So not only are you now wearing an engagement ring AND a wedding ring …BUT… you’re now wearing an added “no occasion, no reason other than add bling to my finger ring.”

You’ve promised me 4 weeks to get your #$@% together! I think I’ll have to post your progress on the blog.

Related Posts

Author |

Writer, dating columnist, wife, coffee addict, foodie, fashionista... Melburnian through and through. Muser, dancer, blogger, tweeter. Likes to get her head on telly now and again. Sleeper, dreamer, a sucker for romance. And of course... a cheap date.


9 comments for “Pleased to Meet You!”

  1. Posted by Steve | October 8, 2009, 8:26 pm

    My wife Anna was happy to change her name but the legal stuff is frustrating! People gave us cheques for Steve and Anna Boxwell which we couldn’t cash until the paperwork came through that said that Anna Boxwell existed. The dept misplaced our forms so it was a few months before we got it back (arg). All good now though.

  2. Posted by Luke Harvey-Palmer | October 8, 2009, 9:39 pm

    I was Luke Harvey

    My wife was Rowena Palmer

    We are now the Harvey-Palmers

    We shared the pain of changing our names (but it was harder for me than my wife)

    That was kinda my sacrifice given I didn’t go through childbirth

    (the childbirth part was a joke)

  3. Posted by Suziwong66 | October 8, 2009, 11:23 pm

    Wen i tied the knot my partner was adament i change my despite my strong desire to keep my own name. He even threatened to not marry me if i didnt comply. I complied with his wishes but not happily: as a silent protest i refused to wear my engagement & wediing band! Theyve sat in a drawer for 23 years now. Eventually after 16 years hubby admitted he was stupid for threatening to get his way & said i could do wat i wanted. For the last decade i have been using my name, his name and a combination of both: it works for me in an odd way! Lol
    for the record Emma, its only positive reinforcement if the receiver of the reward doesnt know about it prior to the desired behavior occurs otherwise it is bribery which actually then reinforces an undesireable bahaviour!

  4. Posted by Claire | October 9, 2009, 12:01 am

    I changed my name when I got married 3 years ago. My hubby didn’t pressure me either way, but afterwards he was so happy that I had changed it. I loved having that new identity – a symbolic change to a new part of my life. Same as you I love the idea of being Team Gresty and also having the same name as my future babies. My sister-in-law didn’t change her name but is about to have a bub and is going to change once she is born. Totally persevere with the legal parts – you can pretty much take the same docs round to all your banks etc. It makes it harder and more confusing if you are one name on half your stuff and another for everything else. The only thing I haven’t changed is my passport, because if you don’t change it within 12 months of getting married they charge you $280 for a whole new one, otherwise within 12 months they change it for free. Good luck!

  5. Posted by @leapingjudas | October 9, 2009, 1:15 am

    Why go the traditional route?

    How about having a bit of fun with it and creating a new name together and both discarding the shackles of your old surnames as you embrace the future…

    … it also has the benefits of the possibility of creating a new dynasty ;)

  6. Posted by Denis | October 9, 2009, 2:11 am

    I’m loving these stories… SuziWong66 – you crack me up!!!

  7. Posted by Tristen | October 11, 2009, 10:48 pm

    ahah! “you’re now wearing an added “no occasion, no reason other than add bling to my finger ring.”

    love that

  8. Posted by Pauline | October 13, 2009, 9:48 pm

    Working in a school I can tell you it is frustrating to have the mother’s maiden name different to the childs surname. If the mother decides to retain her maiden name then it is easier to have the child’s name hyphenated to both. It makes the paperwork much easier.

  9. Posted by april | October 14, 2009, 12:22 am

    when I married I changed my surname – it was so bloody annoying. Then I decided to change my name altogether because of family issues,first and last, even more annoying, and now, well, now I’m trying to convince my kids that they want a hypinated(?) surname – don’t think they ever will…its so much hassle :s

Post a comment