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Married Life

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Everything You Need to Know About Budgeting As a Couple – Part 2

So you’ve done your prep from Part One and you’re ready for your first Couples Money Meeting. Here’s how to tackle it. Part 2 in this series that we’ve asked guest poster Timothy Ng from Credit Card Finder to put together for us: With your individual meeting prep done, it is time to lay the [...]

Do You Make These Relationship Mistakes?

Relationships don’t come with instruction manuals. It’s a funny thing, because anytime you’re embarking on a new adventure be it a baby, a holiday, or buying a house, you tend to research everything you can on the subject. But how many people arm themselves with instructions on how to be in a relationship? Not many. [...]

Man-Colds Proven to Exist!

Man-colds do exist! I knew it! I’ve been saying it all along. Says the Daily Mail in London: “Half of men will upgrade a common cold to flu and describe headaches as a migraine to gain maximum sympathy. They will also moan more than women when suffering a bug or virus. This is despite the [...]

Marriage is Good For Your Health!… Until It’s Not

Marriage: When it’s good, it’s very good. But when it’s bad, it’s… deadly? New York Times Magazine recently published this long piece on whether marriage is good for your health or not. Very early studies into the matter, circa 1858, concluded that marriage is a healthy estate and that single people died from disease “in [...]

How to Save a Marriage

Laura Munson’s new book This Is Not The Story You Think It Is: A Season of Unlikely Happiness has just been published, containing the account of the time her husband walked in the door one night, after 20 happy years of marriage and two children, and told her it was over. “I don’t love you. [...]

One of These Things is Not Like the Other

Happiness expert Sophie Keller wrote this great piece over at Huffington Post about whether you and your partner are “Incompatible, or Refreshingly Different” “My husband loves the middle of a quiche and I love the outside. He hates exercise, I love it. He knows everything there is about music, I know very little. Does that [...]

“Me? Oh, I’m Naturally Gorgeous…”

I had just jumped out of the shower this morning and was in the office, pre-make up when Den suddenly asked me what was on my face. “It’s all shiny” he commented. I’d just moisturised. It was nothing different to my usual daily routine, but he’s usually at the gym still when I’m getting ready [...]

Will Marriage Always Have a Place in Society?

It’s pretty much common knowledge by now that the marriage rate in the Western world has been on a steady decline since the 1950s. Even moreso in Europe than in the US, people are electing again and again not to get married. The divorce rate is insane, and divorces are easier and cheaper than ever [...]

mX Column: Man-Hot vs. Girl-Hot

It’s all about new-season fashion as we hit the shops, inspired by last week’s L’Oreal Melbourne Fashion Festival – but how much of what we see walking the runways during the shows will show up in our own wardrobes? And what will the men think of it all? I’m wearing a dress today that I [...]

The Same Four Tracks

You learn a lot about a person when you work and live with them all day, every day. I am fast learning that my husband is a creature of habit. He gets very comfortable with the things that he knows well. For example: All day every day, we hear the same four music tracks over [...]

Mistresses vs. Wives – The Showdown

A survey conducted by the Women’s Weekly shows that nearly half the 1115 respondents that answered the survey report that when they were single they had had an affair with a married or otherwise-committed man. While these affairs rarely led to the break up of the man’s marriage/relationship, over a third of them lasted for [...]

Alphabet Dating: 9 Date Ideas Beginning with A

So to support you (and us) through an Alphabet Dating adventure, we are going to publish a list of date ideas each week that start with our Letter of the Week (Sesame Street, we’re coming after you!) If you’re thinking of Alphabet Dating, now’s a great time to start. You can check back in every [...]

Getting Back on the Date Night Horse

I have to confess, ever since Christmas hit Den and I have been kind of… slack when it comes to date night. It’s been a blur of road trips, holidays, birthdays, anniversaries, partying… summer nights at rooftop bars… bad, bad date night couple. We’ve waned from our usual Wednesday night date night, which means some [...]

mX Column: Lessons from Marriage

It’s my first wedding anniversary today. I can hardly believe a year has flown by, but at the same time it seems almost a lifetime ago. I’m acutely aware that each anniversary is cause for celebration – particularly when statistically speaking, there’s at least a 40% chance that any given couple may not stay married [...]

Rate your Woman’s Driving Skills

My wife’s driving freaks me out! There are 2 ways she manages a car. 1. Foot flat on the accelerator 2. Foot hard on the brake Coming to a halt is in a series of multiple stabs at the brake pedal as if we’re bunny-hopping a manual car – BUT the car is an auto! [...]

Me and Febusave

I am the first to admit that I’m crap when it comes to saving money. For a long time, I was convinced that there were many more interesting things I could be doing with my money, rather than hiding it away where it would never come out to play. Things have changed. For one, I [...]

How Much Does Your Man Pay Attention?

I wrote late last year about creating Love Maps in your mind, to track the small details about your partner that are important. The Daily Mail has reported how millions of men don’t know the most basic of details about their partner – including dress size and even eye colour. 2,000 men in the UK [...]

Why Don’t Men Listen?

I get Deja Vu on a regular basis, what with the amount of times I have to repeat myself during the day. I don’t know what goes through Den’s head when I talk. I can only imagine it’s something along the lines of “miow-miow-miow-miow, miow-miow-miow-miow, miow-miow-miow-miow-miow-miow-miow-miow”… Or perhaps the grating pitch of my voice inspires [...]

Denis! You can’t be friends with your Ex-Girlfriend!

I’m friends with an ex – well she wasn’t technically a girlfriend, just someone I knocked socks with for quite some time. We weren’t always friends… around the time I began knocking socks with Emma the Ex walked out of my life – not because of Emma, just cause it was time to let that [...]

Real Life Couples: Rebecca and Murray

Welcome to one of our new segments for 2010 – Real Life Couples. A tiny insight into the lives of real, actual couples from all over the globe, all going through their own journeys… a very real way to see that each relationship can have it’s ups and downs and that you really do need [...]

From the Velveteen Rabbit

So, I’m in the midst of trying to organise my very messy office, desk and paperwork for the new year (even I am sick of the mess I make!) and I came across all my notes from planning our wedding… this excerpt from the Velveteen Rabbit makes me smile every time, and it unfortunately never [...]

New Year, New Goals

Welcome back! I feel like I’m waking up from a really long hibernation today…. so much to do to! So many things to think about! A new year is a great time for couples to set new goals together… something you can both look forward to, work on together or learn as a couple. It [...]

Merry Christmas!

Merry Christmas Guys! We’re here in rural Victoria celebrating with Den’s family (presents any minute!) after spending a relaxing day with my family yesterday. Denis looks like a stuffed turkey, he’s beached himself on the loungeroom floor after three days of too much food (the Croatian in him doesn’t have a “full” switch!). We’re taking [...]

To Have and to Hold, and to Buy All the Presents.

Ah, the Christmas season. What I want to know is, where on my marriage certificate was the small print that stated “now that you are my wife, the job of sourcing, buying and wrapping presents for everyone we’ve ever known in the history of the world – including my own family – falls to you. [...]

Is Music Unhealthy for Your Relationship?

The Boston Public Health Commission has proposed a new initiative to categorize music into “healthy for your relationship” and “unhealthy for your relationship”. The campaign will arrive in the form of a badge – kind of like the health department’s tick of approval on healthy foods – and is aimed at teenagers, encouraging them to [...]

In Sickness and in Health?

I was fairly taken aback to read recently that a US doctor has just discovered that women with terminal illnesses are seven times – that’s seven – more likely to go through a divorce than men with the same illnesses. Says the article: “When Dr. Marc Chamberlain, a Seattle oncologist, was treating his brain cancer [...]

How to Survive the Festive Season Together

Love it or hate it, there’s no escaping the festive season. And it’s approaching fast! For some, it’s dreams of a white Christmas in front of yule logs, singing carols and trimming the tree… a lot of the time though, the stress of the holidays can result in heated arguments, crappy presents and trying to [...]

Are You and Your Sweetie Speaking the Same Love Language?

It turns out, Denis and I are not speaking the same Love Language… in fact, our Love Languages are so different that Denis might as well talk to me in Klingon for all the good it does to get through, and likewise right back at him. The Love Language theory was developed by a lovely [...]

When Musical Tastes Collide

I went to see Britney Spears last night! I love her, and I’m not ashamed to admit it. Den didn’t come, of course. Britney is definitely not his thing. But, bless him, he’s tolerating it right now as I play her entire back catalogue through his precious Bose speakers and into the apartment. And sometimes, [...]

Elizabeth Gilbert Talks Soulmates

I was sitting down to lunch the other day and I flipped on the TV to find Elizabeth Gilbert, author of the beautiful book Eat, Pray, Love, was on Oprah. I’d been looking for some source of inspiration all week after feeling a little stuck and Elizabeth was a breath of lovely, fresh air for [...]

The Secret to Hugh Jackman’s Happy Marriage

Well, we were thrilled to see this headline in The Age newspaper today: “The Secret to Hugh Jackman’s Happy Marriage” The Age reports: “Hugh Jackman has a happy marriage because he has date nights. The X-Men Origins: Wolverine star – who has been married to Deborra-Lee Furness since 1996 – has revealed he and his [...]

Do Soulmates Exist?

I got thinking about this after reading a recent guest post on Mamamia… Do soulmates exist? I think… I think so, but I think there is more than just one other true soul mate out there for everyone. Like maybe there’s a certain – batch – of people that we are somehow connected to. The [...]

Tinky-Winky-Pummy-Umpkin-Snookie-Bum.

Rove’s little presenting dance got me thinking… It’s amazing the things we’ll do in a relationship. The way Den and I act sometimes, I swear… there’s the silly in-jokes that make no sense to anyone, chasing each other around the house squealing like children, singing silly songs loudly at each other with made-up lyrics (in [...]

Rove Interviews Tasma – Adorable!

Okay, so I’m a little behind the eight-ball on this one. I didn’t see the actual show (it was a couple of weeks ago) and my sister-in-law just told me how seriously cute Rove and Tasma were together on Rove’s show! (Ah, for our American audience, Rove is our favourite talk show host over here [...]

Government Gives Second Honeymoon for Troubled Couples

A Malaysian state government is taking it upon themselves to give assistance to troubled couples, encouraging them to work on their relationship rather than divorcing – by sending them on a second honeymoon and providing counseling. (Source: AP) KUALA LUMPUR, Malaysia – A Malaysian state government says it plans to offer free honeymoons to save [...]

Pleased to Meet You!

After our marriage in March, I started to go about the process of changing my name. It was a decision I made (with some very strong encouragement from Denis) and am still very happy with. I like the idea of being on Team Merkas, of me and my children all having the same unified family [...]

I’m Breaking Up with You!

I found this clip from the Man stroke Woman comedy sketch. It’s pretty funny… if you haven’t seen it, it’s worthwhile checking out… cracked me up! These guys are from the same team that brought you the Man Cold Syndrome – if you like this vid check you’ll most likely enjoy the Man Cold… here [...]

“Some People are Just Happier in a Relationship”

I know I’m one of those people. Last time I was single, I gave myself a horrible haircut, dyed my hair a different (hideous) colour and promptly stacked on 10 kilos (that’s 20 pound in American-speak) which was quite the feat considering I was training in dance for hours per week… I was the exact [...]

How to Make a Love Map

In our spring clean-up this week (more on that later), I unearthed a file of papers from when Den and I did our pre-marriage education weekend earlier this year. In Australia, these weekends are generally a prerequisite for marrying in any given church – though after being pleasantly surprised by the genuinely great information we [...]

Do Opposites Really Attract?

Den and I, we’re not much alike in many of our behaviors. That is to say, we definitely were not much alike when we first met, but over the years I think we have softened each other away from our extreme opposite behaviors… we’re becoming more and more similar all the time – to the [...]

Man Cold Syndrome (aka, poor Den)

Emma believes that when I am sick I suffer from Man Cold Syndrome… WTF? Friday, I busted my leg in judo class. I don’t think it’s broken, but it’s not a happy leg – there is definitely damage to the medial ligament of the knee and something funky is going on at the lateral side [...]

Planning Holidays Together

Coming up to summertime in Australia, it’s about that time of year we should be planning our Christmas holidays if we want even a chance at securing a good holiday house, hotel or destination… or even securing a good bunch of people to holiday with. I’m not actually sure if we will take a holiday [...]

Table for One?

With Den away all week, I’ve had plenty of time to be alone, indulge in all that Secret Single behavior without having to lock doors and such… last night, I even took MYSELF on a date night. Alone. I was watching the lovely Mia Freedman and a panel of mothers on 9am yesterday morning talking [...]

Domestic Goddess, I Am Not

Forgive me for saying this (and hear me out, please, before you start with any hate comments!) but (oppression aside) I’ve always loved the image of the 50s housewife… a capable, industrious woman who took the running of her household into hand and knew that having a harmonious family life was just as important as [...]

The Heart Grows Fonder

Den is away this week; gallivanting off in the snow with a group of friends while I’m here at home holding down the business fort. He’s having a wonderful time, and I’m having a great time too. I quite love having the house to myself, my own space to relax, think, play my cheesy pop [...]

Living With Messy People

My poor husband. I’m messy, you see. I’m not talking about dirty or unclean. It’s just… I thrive best in organized chaos. You should see my desk. It’s piled with papers, notepads, post-its, books, an ornament of Ganesh (no idea), a calculator, sunglasses, hand sanitizer, unopened mail, stray jewelry that I take off and never [...]

The Proposal: Part 1

It occurs to me that Den and I have been doing some spouse-bashing on this blog lately, what with our airing of bad habits and petty annoyances! It’s all in good humor of course… that’s just the way we are with each other. We’ve faced reality about our differences and are happy to air them [...]

In Pursuit of Healthiness

I’ve taken up Pilates, which has been a long time coming for me. I have kind of an… aversion… to exercise. In that I hate it. Well, mostly I hate it. You could call it a like-hate relationship, I suppose. My newfound okayness with Pilates makes for a Very Pleased Husband. Den is somewhat of [...]

My Wife is a Petty Thief!

How many guys out there have woman who loves your stuff? Emma says using my things makes her feel closer to me – from my daggy clothes, to my pyjamas (yes I love pyjamas!) to my socks and worst of all – my pens! “I feel closer to you when you’re not around…” I think [...]

Things I Wish My Husband Would Let Me Throw Out

Bringing two people’s belongings together into one house was never going to work. Lifetimes of memories, sentimentality and just plain bad taste will always haunt us… here is a comprehensive list of things I wish Denis would let me throw out… or at least move to some ‘man room’ – which we don’t have in [...]