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Date Night Fails

Worst Date So Far!

Golf! According to the $30 date night rating system, the popularity of going to a driving range is rated lower than average, and fair enough… if the majority of voters don’t like golf that’s ok with me.

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Last night I took Emma for hit on the driving range as our date… it didn’t pan out so well! We got 100 balls and lined ourselves up amongst what looked like professionals with their white gloves and Ping golf clubs, I could see this was making Ems nervous.

I once heard that GOLF is known by some as an acronym standing for Gentlemen Only, Ladies Forbidden. Whether that’s true or not, last night I should have taken it seriously. Emma’s form was shocking, but that’s to be expected – we’re not golfers!

I couldn’t help but laugh for the entire time we were at the driving range… Emma would swing and miss, then swing again and just tip the ball to watch it roll off the plastic grass and onto the driving range. With each swing of the golf stick Emma’s eyes got redder! She was pissed, and it was my fault!

She didn’t say it was my fault, but I could feel it… I was uncomfortable, uncomfortable enough to laugh myself silly – I’m sure it didn’t help.

Now I’m no golfer either, actually my first real hit was only 5 days ago… and I do my fair share of shitty shots. Not to mention that I almost tossed my club into the guy on the left of me last night… too funny (it wouldn’t have been if I actually let go). I felt out of place giving Emma tips, like I’ve got any golfing skills to pass on. We’re coming to last of the balls, and I thought, fuck it… I’ll tell her what I see, “try getting some rotation in your hips, you look stiff and uncomfortable, and stop being focused on having to hit a good shot!” Emma swung and crack, this ball went straight out onto the driving range.

Emma turns her head back to me and draws the hair from her face… the red eyes were gone, she had a huge smile on her face, and bleated out “that felt awesome!”

OMG, like… thank you!!!!!!!!!! There will be no tears tonight. Emma went for another swing… she had rotation in her hips and was looking relaxed, the ball was moving! Great another good shot! Now we’re not talking Tiger Woods, it’s getting 50 yards or so, but trust me that’s much better than before. Em’s now giggling and relaxed.

Whack… another great hit! And another smile on her face… 3 more balls to go, “they’re all yours babe, go for it, whack away!” Em’s ripped through the last of the balls with relaxed shoulders and a happy face. I was saved!

“Do you want to get another 100 balls?” Emma said. A quick check of the phrase and how it was used… hmmm… “do I want?” If she has phrased it with “let’s get” I would have said yes… but I’m thinking she may possibly still be pissed with me… for most of the time on the driving range I was public enemy #1. Golf cost us $21 for balls and clubs… she’s happy now so let’s not push it, her swing can turn to shit any second, so I thought… quit while we’re ahead, while she’s happy. The remainder $9 can get us coffee and cake in Acland Street – lets bounce!

In the End it all worked out, but damn that was close! I must admit, this date night was for me – I was thinking about myself as that’s the 3rd day this week I’ve been at a driving range (and I’ve been loving it). Not to mention, Emma was already in a pissed mood before we even left for golf.

I don’t think date night has to always be about your partner… I don’t think there is anything wrong with being a little selfish at times and make your partner do something outside the norm. Be careful if you push your partners comfort circles, you need to be prepared for the consequences and they are not always a success! Remember the key to this is that its ok if you SOMETIMES are a little selfish – not ALL THE TIME!

Also, don’t repeat the same date night twice! Today Em’s already told me that she would go back to the driving range for another hit with me… that’s great, and I’m sure we will, but not on a Wednesday night.

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5 comments for “Worst Date So Far!”

  1. Posted by Ems | September 25, 2008, 10:16 pm

    Ok, firstly I love how you have exaggerated how bad I am to make your story sound better!

    Secondly, I was not “about to cry”!

    Yes, I was in a bad mood and seeing as I kept hitting the GROUND on the first 20 or so strokes, my arms were KILLING me before long. Yes, you were thinking of yourself for date night… neither is a bad thing (Shit happens) but a combination of both those things does not a happy date night make.

    Golf is a hard one as it requires a certain level of skill. I’ve even had a lesson before so I knew a little bit and I still sucked at it! If your sweetie has never played and you think they will be intimidated then perhaps rethink it… and a few things to make going easier… pick a warm time of year so you’re not freezing your butt off, get a wine or beer into yourself at the clubhouse first to relax yourself and go when it’s quiet and not full of “real” golfers showing off their swings!

  2. Posted by Ems | September 25, 2008, 6:46 am

    I just wrote a HUGE comment in response and just as I was hitting the submit button, Denis disconnected our internet without checking first. I don’t know whether to cry or strangle him. I’ll comment tomorrow when I can remember what the hell I wrote. Later.

  3. Posted by Willy | November 7, 2008, 12:19 am

    I’ve been playing for 13 years, have a very low handicap, take my dad’s money every time I play with him, and I can tell you…it can still be frustrating. So yeah, I can see where that would be a bad idea. But here’s a good one: if you want to golf more often in the future and not get kicked off the course and cursed at by everyone else there, take lessons together…just maybe? :)

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